Let's just make this simple.
I'm having a relationship with Aliff Bin Raffi Faizal Bin Omar
'She didn't just kissed, she claimed ownership. Took his mouth with urgency,
as if her life depended on her kissing him.' You know how is it when you love
someone? And the hard part, the bad part, the Jerry Springer Show part is
that you never stop loving someone. There’s always a piece of them in your heart.
Were you so afraid of losing something you love, that you refuse to love anything?
Sometimes I'd be glad if only you'd fought for me.
She fell, she hurt, she felt. She lived. And for all the tumble of her experiences,
she still had hope. Maybe this next time would do the trick. Or maybe not. But
unless you stepped into the game, you would never know. When we were children,
we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable.
But to grow up is to accept vulnerability. To be alive is to be vulnerable. My HomepageTaggedTumblrTwitter
Know that the pain will pass and when it passes ,
you will become stronger , happier , more sensitive and aware .
We can know what love is. It’s adults who have forgotten, so they cling to their poor substitutes and yell at kids who dare to live with real love. Pure love. Love without compromise or distraction. Hell, when you’re a kid you’ve got all the energy and all the free time in the world. You’ll never have a chance to devote more to love ever again in your life.
*Shit this stage , it's crampy in here .* After school , camwhored in class and dance like there's no tomorrow . Fun , Brian , Heidi , John & Pei Shi was there too . Attend RedCross after that , John lost my other pair of boots ._. now I gotta find a way to order it , daymn . So , there's Enrolment cum Promotion . The 1st runner up had to dance for the show , the stage was so cramp and was sucha total fail -.- but fun though .
Saturday Morning :
*Whoa?! whole school?!* My dad send me to school on his way to work , so I arrived earlier than anyone , which is like 6.40am ? I went to foyer and texted everyone that Imma get to sleep . 7.57am , I woke up and noticed I had missed calls and unread messages , I called Brian back (: then he asked howta get through John because John's prepaid was left with non . Hahah :D then , few minutes later KitYee & Jasmine arrived , then Alin and then the rest .
Practised , make-up , changed and got ourselves ready for our performance at Evergreen Secondary School which is just a few blocks away from my step-cousin's house , we bus-ed there and fell asleep halfway .
After performing , I was astonished to have seen my cousin there ! (well , my mum's side . ) We hugged each other and went crazy mannn ! :D She joined Red Cross too . Then after everything's done , I rushed out and not taking the journey back to school with the rest 'cos I gotta get changed for a concert that night .
Saturday Night :
*OMG* Went SingaporeIndoorStadium(SIS) with my two sisters and my sister's friend and my brother and my parents , UNGU ! nothing much to say about it , cos the lightings made me feel sleepy but I scream like mad , when HADY MIRZA cam out ! omgomgomg ,zomg , hady was hot mannnzxs . HAHA . Went to Changi after that , dinner with seafoods baby ! Went home , and get to sleep right after everything .
Friday, April 23, 2010 7:55 AM
I've hit the jackpot baby !
FunFun to the core babes (: Life's great and I'm fine living my life like myself . Went and spent a whole loada time with my classmates :D Went Clarke Quay with my classmates , teacher's treat to our improvement on our Maths (or something like that O.o) , celebrated Jolyn's 15th Birthday at the same time , but I didn't took a photo with her -.- Happy to the maximumsss . Not thinking about Zielah or anything and anyone , but just moving forward and trying not to look behind (:
Yesterday , bus-ed our way to Queensway . Nicholas , Phoebe , Brian , Wei Jun , Heidi , Alin and me ! Lunched at Macs , then Phoebe went to her tuition and Alin went home with her friend , and she was HAPPY ABOUT IT .
Went Ikea with the remaining , the guys wanted to eat hotdogs -.-" then , we walked around , see sofa then we slackkkkk :D we did made ourselves like really at home . Brian went inside the cupboard , wanted to hide from Wei Jun and Nicholas , haha . But they locked him up instead -.- funny ! I took a video of it , haha ! crap . Then , it rained superheavily , I walked in the rain with Heidi to bustop , I took 961 , I was wondering why the bus was going towards my grandma's house which is Tiong Bahru there and I've figured it out that I've taken the wrong side ! Stoopit sio . I dropped at Bukit Merah Central , took 961 again ._. at 6 plus y'know ! I reached woodlands interchange like 2 hours later , and I didn't get to sit down , people were all looking at me like a zombie tryna MUNCHMUNCH me up ._. then , I reached the interchange , I saw Joshua Justin Yeo , I was waiting for 913 while he 912 . So , he was right infront of me , he didn't even get a peepy look at me ! damn . HAHA , so arrogant pfft .
Brian Chan ! Last day of Teaching S3I'2010 . Took a photo with him , hahah ! Nice right (: Although we didn't quite manage to listen to his lessons ._. okok , i gotta check out my fb now (: buhbye ~
Sunday, April 18, 2010 2:29 AM
Maybe everything that falls down , eventually rises .
When my days are dark and my nights are cold You come over so I won't be alone You canceled an engagement with your friends I cherish every single second that we spend And I can count on you to never let me down You tell me that you love me without making a sound And I can't help the way I feel when you are around .
Cos when the sun comes out on a rainy day And I thought i'll never love again without my saint There you are (there you are, you are, you are, you are, you are) There you are When the times got hard they said you'll leave Turns out you were the only one that stood by me There you are (there you are, you are, you are, you are, you are) There you are
I've gotten myself obsessed with that song by Iyaz :D I wanted to update on Friday , but i ended up checking my mails and updating facebook , then off to sleep . Haha , could be because I was too tired . Why not ? Farwin , Lysha , Lyn , Indah , Jasmine , KitYee , Jacqueline , John , Juliana and I played catching around the courtyard building of our school . Hahah :D it was fun and made myself forgetting about my feelings about my ex-boyf . I'm feeling weird saying him as my ex-boyf . sigh , miss him effing much mannn . Yesterday got home late and no one was at home . Hahah :D
Wednesday, April 14, 2010 10:05 PM
Let Me Be Whom I Wanna Be .
Music saves my soul , I agree to it . But how am I gonna be saved when most of the songs are all about you . I miss you , so much more than I'd ever did . You've no idea how much precious to me . I've always thought our love would be the best I've ever had , but I didn't know it would come to an end someday . Well boy , it was helpless anyway there's nothing much I could do or say that it had to end this way . So boy , here's to you , I hope that when you've found her , that she would always be true to you to love and understand you , soon you'll build new memories then slowly you'd forget about me then I would slowly be a distant memory .
In school , I screamed here and there . I couldn't cry in class , so I got myself insane to sadness ..
YAY ~!!! :D MY MP3 WORKING NOW . yesyesyes (: who's the best ? who's the best ? who's the best ?! YANA YANA YANA :D YANA MINNIE MOUSE (: I LOVE MY EX , HAHA :D so what if he isn't my boyfriend now ? I love my ex , and oh , you calling me a 'Biatch' ? HAHA , call yourself one of them before you invite me okay Zielah or whoever you are la kans , my blog , my post , my feelings , my hal , my life . You away , from ME life , you no no bitch . HAHA ! i'm crazy , i a no fighter , fight for what ? my rights ? Haha , everyone has their rights , dont tell me imma be enemies with all . HAHA , i don't give a damn if you are to take Ayu away from me , cos I know my heart is always with , why ? COS I SAID SO (: I love my life . heeeeh :B
Tuesday, April 13, 2010 11:05 PM
Life's a bitch , you live it and then you die .
I still can't believe he's gone just like that , he texted me just now , while i was in school .. i put my battery bback in my phone and switched it on , i was over the rainbow when i saw 'My Superman' appearring in my inbox , highlighted boldly black . __ My Superman ! (1.40pm) Hey , eu there ? Pls dnt hate me . Im sry .. __
Why must we always end things , I know nothing lasts forever but , sigh .. I don't know whatta say . I just miss him so much and can't seem to forget him . I miss him , I felt as if you're my first and last love . I never thought it would be this hard to let go .
So what when I've liked other guys ? no matter what , the most I love and can't live without is Mhd Shari Bin Mhd Idris . But he's gone now , can't stop the truth .
25/01/09 - 12/04/10
Mhd Shari , Thanks for the love and concern and time you'd spent for me . I never knew my feelings would be like this sooner or later , but I can't seem to find the difference in you and all of the other guys . Are you cruel or are you not ? I tried keeping those tears in but I can't seem to control it .
Who the hell is this Zielah ? She texted me , She's your girlfriend and told me to stop bothering you and we're over ? We've been together for a year baby , a year and 3 months ? How could I let you go ? I've waited for you patiently , texted you each time I've reached school or reached home and I know you won't reply . Why must you be away from me ? I thought you said you love me whenever you did . I miss you so much and never thought it would end . What have I done ? You should've just told me earlier that you want to leave me shattering apart , never would I thought us to be over . The first time I hear your voice , it made my heart smiles and I fell for you . When we first met , I never planned out how I want to spend my time with you . You hurt me was all I could say for now . Never have I ever ever thought of letting you go , I've waited for you , thinking I could be with you like how we used to when we met earlier on . I was born when you kissed me , i was living my life when i'm with you , I died when you left me . She told me you've been together since November ? Yeah , now I can understand why You and Your friends always tease me of scandaling when you yourself is just the same . Guys , I don't see any difference in each of them .
After checking facebook , I felt like I just wanna scream and jump down from a cliff . I studied hard in school , thinking I could be a good person , or maybe more than a person to you . I waited for you , I never knew you would just vanish off just like that . You're just the same . No one can prove me wrong . So , that's it , this time , we're seriously over Shari . Oh , not to worry , I still can live without you .
Sunday, April 11, 2010 3:34 AM
Love is great when you find someone to give it to.
Hola Me Bebe . Maryana's in tha house yaw ! Guess what , Khairi AKA Kid , is such an eff . So much for saying wanna wait for me till whatever it is ah , checkcheck , he's already in a Relationship with some chica -.-" the same goes to WanComa . Kate jekk , masok hospital lah ape lah , so in love with me lah , in the end attached . like kanina like that right . Who damn effing care anyways .. Hahah ..
I miss Ayu AkA Shari . Friday night , played Truth or Dare with John , Jacqueline , Alin , Heidi , Kit Yee and Jasmine . Alin went home first before we do . Cos she needs to be home by 10pm . I dared John to call my boyfriend , which is Ayu , duh -.-" I told him , if Ayu picked up the call , hang up .If couldnt get through , then he'll pass . John called , Ayu picked up the call . I was like =O omg-ing down there . I felt as if it has been for ages since I last heard his voice when it has been just weeks . That means he received all of my messages which I've been sending to him , and him not replying . I miss him so much .
Aviation - You were my everything . That song I found in my mp3 after I'd gotten my mp3 back from Ayu . I cried the first time I heard the song . Pretty much imagining him singing them to me . He is no.1 in my heart . The first time I met him , we were at the void deck , I was with Charlene . It really seemed so magical and the first time I came to his house with my school uniform on . All the times we had , I ran away from home and I felt safe whenever he's beside me , while I was sleeping on the cold floor of the block with my girlfs , he came and cover me with his sweater above me , watched me sleep , accompanied me till I woke up . He took us to Tiong Bahru Park , the girls sat on the surface and him and farid turned us round and around .
While we're together , I know I've been bad to have loved other guys too . Ridwan was one of them , and so is Rahman and Khairi . But no matter what , he'll always be in my heart . I knew I've made him cried , not being there for him whenever he's there for me . I've lived my life with him now and I want it to be forever . I've never regretted giving my love to him .
And ohnyways , on Thursday I didn't went to 2.4km run , and I stayed in the school kitchen with Heidi Alin Jasmine . Made snacks for Friday's selling off . I made chocolate truffle (: with the help of heidi charlene and alin ! (: it was nice . Jasmine made the chocolate cornflakes ! (: Later , meredith and jacqueline and kityee came along after they had the 2.4km run . Hahaha :D it was effing fun , we stayed till 730pm . We sell'em the next day .
Wednesday, April 7, 2010 10:13 AM
April 7 MANNNN :D
heyhey (: having Music now . Haven't been updating & you're gonna read that sentence more and more these days . Okay ? hmm .. My boyf hasn't been contacting me these days .. Feeling smaller , been late for school these days .
I was late today , for school . Took 196 with John , he bought me a bottle of coke ! ~ cool or what ?! Hahaha . he's my abang , so . nothing much okay ?..
Mhd Shari Bin Mhd Idris , Gue merindui kamu banget dehhh ! I miss you so much , that I just have this feeling of wanting to punch your face when I meet you one day , I hope . The sooner the better . At the same time , I just felt that this is like the best for the both of us . We wouldn't have to meet whenever either of us can't . I miss you just like the air that I breathe baby . I'm sorry if I'm just too busy with my school , but I'm studying for my life's sake or maybe our .. But I believe that you and I will be back to normal , together , like last time ..
And oh , I tried Naughty G with Sya yesterday after we've served our detention in school . HAHAHAHAH , tastes like red bull . It said that it's good for stamina and him and her . HAHA . I told Sya , why not during Napfa we drink the Naughty G , confirm will get Gold . HAHAHAH . What the hell mannnn . The world is shaking and i'm paranoid ~
I'm gonna update soon , again about the outing ! :D hahaha .